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Hello there sweetheart(s)! I'm Wan Chi and welcome to my personal space. I grew up in lovely Malaysia and I'm based in London now. You're welcome to explore as much as you want and ask any questions but please, be nice and be respectful. Thanks! ♥

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hi guys . i know i haven't blogged in awhile (A2 trials in 2 weeks sorry !) . today's blog post is something out of the norm , it's about something serious and has been impacting me for quite awhile now , i've tweeted about it before but never really gone through it thoroughly . 

today's blog post is about : 

i'm pretty sure almost every girl has been cat-called at before . one of my freshest memories of such an incident happening to me when i was younger was at the tender age of thirteen . at that time , i'd gone to KL with two of my friends , a guy and a girl to the Bukit Bintang area to do some shopping . and even though me and my friends were tweens who looked so juvenile and probably acted like we were still in primary school , STILL there were men who whistled and stared at us . Even though we were with a guy friend who looked pretty big for his age , STILL these men couldn't keep their eyes to themselves and spoke about us in their native languages . you know that feeling when you walk past /  see someone and instantly you know they're talking about you ? yep . now i don't mean to be racist , but i think all Malaysian girls and women alike would agree that such actions are usually done by the foreign workers and immigrants in the country . What more when the KL city centre is filled with such people ?

fast-forward six years later and I am almost nineteen now . of course i no longer look the same , but regardless , the same thing still happens when i'm alone or even with friends or my boyfriend . one more incident i can recall is in 2015 . me and my KTJ house mates from Jawahir planned a Leavers' Night for our seniors in KLCC . we were playing station games in the KLCC park when two or more immigrants who were standing near us began staring and speaking to each other . a few minutes later , they approached me and my friend and asked if they could take a picture with us . of course we said no , who knew what they would do to those photos ? Afterwards he walked away but still stood close enough to watch our every move , which of course made us queasy to even think about it . later , after they walked away for good , a senior came over to me and told me "Wan Chi , they were taking photos of you ."

the reason i'm writing about this today is because i went for a run today . i live in a residential area with lots of houses and a commercial area . usually when i run , i only run around the compounds of my housing area or i drive down to the nearby park which is frequented by other runners too . today i decided to challenge myself by running TO the park instead of driving , as i've seen many people do that before , plus i wanted to train for the upcoming cross country . 

anyway , as i was on my way there , i ran past a group construction workers . needless to say of course , they began staring at me like they've never seen a girl before . one man called out to the other in their language and the latter responded with a laugh and an exchange of words . i was already feeling uncomfortable at this point so i ran faster than normal , away from them and towards the park . as i ran away , i could hear the faint noise of a phone camera's shutter clicking away , presumably a picture of me running .

i mean , have you not seen a girl running ??? does the image of a girl in shorts stimulate you to take a photo of her WITHOUT HER CONSENT ??? now , don't go telling me i can't wear shorts to run . if you do , you are the reason we need feminism . i live in a country where it's almost permanently 30 degrees Celsius everyday and i am obliged to wear shorts IF I WANT TO . if i can't even be comfortable jogging in my own housing area without having to worry and be scared of the people building our infrastructure , can i even be comfortable anywhere in this world ? 

when i was running back to my house , ANOTHER group of immigrants (this time they were residential guards) were cycling and looked at me in that weird way of theirs again . i glared back fiercely , but yet they had no shame and continued staring . 

the message i wanna send out today is that us girls shouldn't be so afraid and vulnerable to everything in the outside world . we do not need to change the way we dress , what we do or the way we act for others . others need to control the way they think , have more morale and keep their dicks to themselves cos frankly , they are the ones turning the world into a dangerous place . idk if you've seen this post , but this girl was raped by 10 immigrants , and she didn't even do anything wrong . all she did was wait for a bus and this is what she gets ??! when i read that post , it angered me so much and today i realised i could've been the next headline just by going jogging .

Disclaimer : although my post mainly revolves around the foreign workers in my country , this of course , does not just apply to them , but to all other men who've done the same thing to innocent girls . and to the men who i'm not even referring too , please don't come up with some stupid meninist statement because we all know what's going on is threatening your sister's safety , your girlfriend's , your female friends , your cousins , or even your mother . instead of standing up for obnoxious men , you should stand with the women of the nation , to lower the rate of rape / kidnap cases . after all , it all starts with a simple stare , which follows into a mild stalk , and then a rape case .

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  2015 : My Year in Review
Happy New Year ! another year just passes by in the blink of an eye . during my New Year's Eve , i was hanging around Desa ParkCity for the countdown with my boyfriend and a few of our friends . when the countdown and fireworks were over , my bf turned to me and said "it doesn't feel like a new year yet" and our friend responded by saying "of course lah , it never does feel like a new year ; it's just another day" . and indeed , it's true . i don't think i'll be faced with the truth , at least , not until it's like April or something . HAHA

the one thing i noticed about 2016 , is the amount of people posting on Instagram / FB / Twitter about how their 2015 went or their new year resolutions . in fact , i might've been one of them ... if i had any pictures to post . fml . hence , i decided i might as well do a blog post to recap on all that i've been through on this one hell of a year . P.S. typing this makes me feel like i'm doing one of those YouTube Rewind things lolol .



one year ago , i celebrated my 2015 New Year's Eve at the exact same place i did this year , with the same boy but different friends .. i'm a creature of habit , i must say HAHA .

had some fun with half of the FAB girls before we went our separate ways ..

and of course , started my A-Levels program at KTJ ! i could still remember my first day , not knowing where to go and what to do because i was still nervous ahaha .


February was a pretty good month , with Valentine's and Chinese New Year - which also meant lots of pigging out on good food ! 


March signified the start of our first mid-term break , and i took the opportunity to attend my first MUN conference ever ! all i can say is , it's not really my thing HAHA .

also spent the rest of my holidays with my loved ones from KL and Penang , it was good to be back in my hometown :)


April was a stressful but exciting month , stressful because we all were about to have our A-level Maths exams but exciting because it was a month full of events to attend ! there's nothing i love more than dressing up and going to parties to meet all my friends heh 💓


May was my month ! my birthday month , that is . truly enjoyed my birthday this year as i received not one , but three surprises ! i've never gotten a surprise birthday party before so this came as a really joyful event for me 😿

it was also exam season ... so this was basically me after all our papers zz .


June and July were summer holiday season , so i spent it by interning at an international firm in KL (i won't say which) for 3 weeks . the internship was certainly an unforgettable experience .. spent the rest of the summer with Kun Yew / friends . also , finally FINALLY did a shoot with qt pie Joanna ! 


August meant going back to school , rushing to the dining hall just to be first in line , HOUSE SINGING (!!) , prep times and studying . glad to have gotten a single room this term as it was AS season and i certainly dreaded it :/ 

also , finally gave my overgrown hair the big chop !! just an extra bit of information : i cut it off in an indian barber shop for RM7 . HAHAHAH 


AS season and study leave meant i could head home a lot , but that didn't mean i wasn't stressed out for exams .. still , had a lot of fun this month and my cousin got married !! it was also my first anniversary with the bf :) 


these two recent months were months of friendship , months of giving and receiving , and months of new beginnings . i actually have more photos from November and December but haven't gotten the time to transfer them yet . very very grateful to reconnect with my Penang darlings in these months and also spend lots of time with my family :)


all in all , 2015 has definitely seen lots of ups and downs in my life . Religion-wise , i've been backsliding a lot this year , and admittedly i still haven't found my way back home . Academically , it's been a long struggle and at times i just really feel like giving up A-levels and pursuing an easier course . it has also been hard having to deal with family issues when it clashes with future plans i had in mind . Relationship-wise , my platonic relationships were proven to me , as i managed to single out those who really cared for me and those who didn't . it was amazing getting into a new environment and meeting people of all diversity . i truly enjoyed my time at KTJ and will continue to enjoy it despite their sometimes-overboard-rules .. In my romantic relationship , i must say that i've learnt a lot in this year . Just because a relationship looks perfect online doesn't mean it stays that way behind-the-scenes . Kun Yew and i have had our fair share of drama this year but i'm glad it made us stronger as individuals as well as a couple . Body image issues have always been something i struggled with but this year it took a toll on me as i gained a significant amount of weight . Having different sorts of news broken to me this year have given me mixed feelings , some overjoyed , some worried , and some sad .

i guess i never really wanted 2015 to end , as i thoroughly enjoyed so many moments in it . through the emotional and mental pain and struggle , through the fun moments and exciting events , i think i managed to mature holistically . thank you to those who stayed and those who left , i'm always grateful for new experiences and past lessons .

as for 2016 ? my only goal is to work hard on pleasing myself and not care about anyone else , as this is something i've always never been able to do .. i hope all of you have an amazing New Year , set those resolutions right and work for it . Thank you so much for reading and being with me for one year xxx


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